Lost my best friend because.....?

Question

I suffer from depression only 19 and I've lost many friends to it but there's this one friend who I trusted the most and relyed on an depended on to help me though the depression and I guess I took alot out on her bcos I'm angry all the tym bcos I'm upset abrt how I'm dealin with the depression and she was my best friend and last week she told me she Neva wanted me to contact her again. Now I've got no friends left and no1 to talk to or help me. It upsets me ever since she told me not to contact her, she doesn't seem bothered I guess ive hurt her too much by taking my anger out on her bcos I'm upset but I don't and never mean it I'm just findin it hard dealing with this depression thing. I miss her lots. She hates me. I wish she was my friend again.

Answer 1

It sounds like your friend is having a hard time dealing with YOUR depression and it may be bringing her down too. If her Mother is telling you not to contact her than she probably feels that she needs to protect her daughter. It sounds like your friend needs a break. It's really hard to take on someone else's depression. All the anger, mood swings, crying, it takes it's toll on you, so you don't know how she may be feeling. If she's been there for you the whole time through your anger, tears etc and even her friendship doesn't bring you out of your depression...even a little bit, she may feel defeated. Not only that but, after being there for you and letting you vent off all your depression on her might make her depressed and down too. I know first hand that depression sucks and I feel for you. But your friend may just need a break.



Depression is hard, but it can be turned around. Everyone goes through some type of depression. Have you been diagnosed with depression? If you have been diagnosed, what have the doctor's told you to do for it? You're 19 and you've said that your depression has been going on for a year. So you weren't depressed before? You need to find out what the reason for your depression is (if you don't know already) and then deal with that problem. Did you have something traumatic happen to you that's caused this or did you just "wake up" one day depressed? If you want your friend back, you may have to deal with your depression and get it out of your life. I know it seems hard but you can do it. You've admitted that you have no more friends. Has your depression turned everyone away? Defeat your depression. Good luck to you.

Answer 2

The best thing you can do is tell her that you're sorry, ask her to forgive you and in case she does stop doing all the bad things you know you do.



If she doesn't forgive you, then think of it as valuable live experience, learn from it and try to be a person you like to be. You should do things that make you feel good and confident about yourself, that's how you'll get new friends. People will always betray, the whole world can make you feel sad and depresed, but just try to channel your feelings into something... pick up a hobby: try drawing, photography or start learning to play a musical instrument - these are things done for your own satisfaction and the best depression killers.

Answer 3

Write her a letter saying you miss her and you're sorry, and explain how you feel. And ask her if she'll give you one last chance to show her you can be a good friend. And that if she wont you'll understand and leave her alone. And whatever she decides, you just want her to know you are very sorry, and you shouldn't have taken her for granted, and that you hope she can at lest find it in her heart to forgive you if nothing else. Then mail it to her. Going through the trouble of writing something instead of texting and emailing shows that you are sincere. Good luck hope you get your friend back and treat her well this time. If it doesn't work then move on. I know that's hard to do but believe me you will make new friends sooner or later. And you'll be a lot happier if you try not to linger on this girl. And next time you're feeling angry, instead of taking it out of people try telling them whats wrong or take a moment away from them to go take a hot shower. That way you have time to figure out why you are mad and you wont be near anyone you can take it out on.

Answer 4

A true friend never leaves you, he/she will always stay by your side, thick or thin. This is a challenge of real friendship. Try to talk to her. If she doesn't want to forgive you, she is not a true friend. I've experienced this before and I'm only 15. Now I am happier because I am outgoing and I have forgotten the bitter past. Start living your life in a new direction. Do some stuff. Take lessons. Go to online forums. Have fun. :D

Answer 5

Oh dear. Poor you.....and poor her. Depression breeds depression unfortunately and she's now caught it off you and needs a rest from you and it. Depression makes you very selfish. It's all about how YOU feel (quite naturally) and not about how other people are managing to deal with you while you've got it. It's that sort of illness. As you have realised, instead of getting proper therapy, you've been using your best friend as a therapist (who is a professional trained to deal with your behaviour and anger). Your friend was just that. A friend who did her best but gradually succumbed to your illness and didn't know how to cope. It's obviously bad for her as her mother has now stepped in to protect her daughter - again quite naturally. Now you are on the receiving end of HER depression and it's not nice is it. It's now all about HER depression, how SHE feels, and you are left in limbo trying to cope with your own illness. You are not going to get anywhere by trying to see or speak with your friend. She needs a break. She needs the rest from you and your illness so she can recover from her own problems. If you are a good friend to her and are really remorseful, then you will leave her well alone to get over it. Once she's better she will be able to cope with life again. You should have great sympathy for her because you know just how she feels. I think you should go back to your doctor/therapist and explain what has happened and allow these professionals to deal with you and your illness/medication. You obviously cannot cope alone so don't even try to. As for your poor friend, I suggest you write a NICE letter to her and her mother. Apologise for your bad behaviour. Ask for her forgiveness and promise not to contact her again until you are better. Then stick to your promise. Her mother may pass on your friend's forgiveness to you and you will have to be satisfied with that. Do NOT badger her or her mother for an answer. I doubt very much if she hates you (unless, of course, you have been particularly hateful and hurtful to her) as she's been understanding enough to put up with all this for a year and will probably come round to speaking to you eventually. But you must respect her position on this. If she chooses never to contact you again then it's all you deserve and you will just have to accept it. Meanwhile, go back to the professionals and get proper help because you need it for your own sake. Good luck

Answer 6

First of all, I am extremely sorry for what happened.

Second, you aren't a shitperson. The depression isn't your fault at all.

Third, If you can't contact her, contact her mom. tell her sorry and that you are extremely sorry. Go to their house or apartment and tell it to them there. First thing you should say is "I am sorry" "please forgive me." they cant ignore or delete YOU.



If they keep being jerks, its their fault. You should find better friends. I'd be your friend.

Have your parents or something contact hers. They should talk too. Technically, its not you.

Answer 7

If she can't understand what you're going through, then I'd say she's not a very good friend in the first place.

Answer 8

STOP BEING DEPRESSED THEN