How to tackle a friend that makes you feel you have to buy christmas presents for them...?

Question

I usually just have 2friends I buy Christmas gifts for, they are my closet friends and we all do it for a bit of fun and never spend very much on each other.

I have a friend that im not that close to who a couple years ago decided to start buying me Christmas presents. She did it in a way I couldn't get out of, out of nowhere she started telling me she had already got part of my Christmas present and had just a few more bits to get. I couldn't be ungrateful and say I didnt want it and I did tell her not to go crazy and not get me anymore, but she bigger it up as if it was a massive plan and all went together. So I felt I had to get her something equally thoughtful, I spent more than I wanted and in the end, she clearly hadn't put in as much thought as she made out.

Last year she did the same, announced she had got my present, and hinted about what it was, a spice rack that I had mentioned I wanted when I moved into my new house, now this item was quite expensive so again I felt I had to match the price.
It turns out my gift wasn't the spice rack she had hinted about but a moisturizing/bath kit (something she knew I couldn't use as the year before I gave her all the soaps and things I had received as I have sensative skin and break out with dermetitus)
I also know that the kit she gave me was a present someone had given her for her birthday. I thanked her for the present but did tell her I couldn't use it because of my skin.

This year I thought I would get there first, last week I suggested we go out with some other friends for a meal instead of swapping presents, she then told me she had already got my Christmas present and that she was really excited to give it to me because I will LOVE it. Im however not excited. She then manager to slip into later conversation of things she liked and added "you could get me that for christmas" I was quite annoyed and now think it all started because she wants more presents.

She has a very small family and mine is very large so she knows I have a lot to buy for. Thus year I will just buy her something cheap.

But how do I get this to stop? She seemed very upset when I mentioned just going out for a Christmas meal with friends instead of present swaps.

Answer 1

She seems pretty rude and self centered, honestly.



Either get her something impersonal, in the hopes she'll take a hint, like a gift card to a restaurant, or don't get her anything at all.

Answer 2

I really don't think she's being greedy, I think she wants to know she's your friend and is as important as your other friends,and probably plans on getting you something good but as Christmas gets closer maybe she doesn't have the money,we all feel like we have to buy gifts for people we don't want to,but I do to save face I guess,or not to hurt someone's feelings. If I were you I would say I'm only spending this amount on Christmas for each person and if she says I've already spent more on you then I would tell her to return it, and get something smaller,I wouldn't let it ruin my Christmas,enjoy your family and friends,most people don't use half the stuff we get them anyway!

Answer 3

She is being a selfish little brat!! (no offence :/ ) She is getting you to buy her big amazing presents and then buying you cheap ones, This is also like me and another friend of mine. I buy her ver nice presentf for her birthday but when it comes to mine, she just gives me her previous used presents which is very mean. Therefore, you should buy her simple presents which look like they are worth a lot, like go to ebay and find some nice jewellry in a very nice box and get it for her which looks like its worth a lot but its only actually a fiver. I also like shopping at this site as it has very nice presents for girls but it is very cheap - http://avonshop.co.uk/beauty/c/christmas-shop.html - it has make up and cheap jewellry and other things, i particulary would get her this from that site (Avon)



http://avonshop.co.uk/shop/product.asp?pf_id=35484&from=search&find_spec=santa accespries&pagenum=1



it is earings inside a pretty box which says 'Ho Ho Ho' when opened and it is very cute and very very cheap but looks like it is worth a lot.



Good luck and I hope I helped you find the perfect, cheap gift for an ungrateful person! Haha :) x

Have a good christmas