Should I let it be or hound my friend for the money he owes?

Question

I lent my friend a substantial amount of money to pay for his tuition because he didn't have enough (he is on academic probation also) and he said he was going to pay me back last month and I havent said anything.... what should I do?

Answer 1

Look at the small details before deciding to hound him for money. Is he working extra hard to get off academic probation? Does he have a steady job? Does all his money seem to go for necessities like food, insurance, rent ect... or does it all seem to go to partying?



Be a good friend if he's working hard in school and spending his money responsibly (especially if he has very little income). If you really need the money back, discuss a fair payment plan with him ($50 a month maybe?). I know my dad lent my fiancee a big amount of money to get back in school a few years ago. He was suppose to pay it back after the semester, but simply couldn't afford to pay all of it. So he sat down with my dad, explained his situation, gave him what he could then and worked out a payment plan. My dad never had a problem with the fact his financial situation did not permit him to pay back every penny right away, plus he'd gotten all A's and B's, and was willing to do the best he could. And that was my dad lending money to my then boyfriend. If a dad can do that for the guy who's with his daughter, a friend can be reasonable too.



But if he's messing around in school, and using all his money to party, then I'd give him one more month to make good on his debt on his own, then start hounding him. Be a real pain in the a** about it. That's not right.

Answer 2

If it's college tuition, I'll bet it's quite a bit of money you LENT him. Ask him for the money. Say something like how's school going? Are you doing better this semester? I was wondering if you'd be able to give back the money I lent you? I need it for some of my expenses.



Did you make it clear it was a loan? Do you have a promissory note?

If your friend is on academic probation, are you sure the money was used for school?



I hate to be a pessimist, but I've lent money to a " friend " and never got it back. If you've seen any of the judge shows on t.v., you know that people lend money to a friend, then when they try to collect, the friend says it was a gift, If you cannot prove it was a loan, you lose.

Answer 3

Get his undivided attention and bring the subject up. Just be cool about it and say something like, "So are you getting around to paying me back that money I lent you, I could really use it" Then let the ball be is his court. If in a week or two you still don't see the money I'd cut your losses and learn a lesson---to choose carefully who I'd loan money to or not to loan it at all. That was very kind of you to try to help a friend. If he is truly a friend, he won't want to keep you waiting too much longer. If you have to wait another month, he's a moocher. ..not a friend.

Answer 4

Ask for it nicely. It's your money, you were kind enough to loan it to him, and you had an oral agreement. If asking doesn't work over a period of time, go to court. That's why it's best to NEVER lend people close to you any substantial amount of money. You almost always end up losing both the money and the relationship.

Answer 5

I'd wait another month and say, "Listen its been two months, and I don't mean to sound like a jerk, but I was kinda hoping you'd have already paid me back by now. I let it go last month, but I really need that money I loaned you." Its as simple as that.

Answer 6

He may be hoping that you will let it go .... don't. You wouldn't loan him your car, then stand back and let him keep it. This is the same thing. He borrowed something of yours and now he needs to return it. At the very least he needs to acknowledge that he still owes you the money and make arrangements to repay you ... starting now.

Answer 7

Well, let me put it to you this way. There's an old saying that before you loan money to a friend you should ask yourself which one you want more. The money? or the friend?

Answer 8

i havent went here in a bit but there are several people that owe me money all i can say is fight or take it as a loss sorry to say but it is true if you are ready to fight for your money (should happen) than do so if not a loss is a loss take it