What is going on here?

Question

At school, I'm a bit of an outsider. I joined the school in year 8 (I'm 12. don't mention that im technically too young. I understand what i am doing, and I'm 13 next month). the others had been there a year already and had formed groups. i was already unwelcomed because I am closely related to one of the teachers, which the kids don't like. that put them off me before they even knew me! I am smart (not trying to be arrogant), and well behaved. I am well liked by the teachers, and do well in school. sadly, I don't have many friends. I knew a few kids before I started (even though a couple have now turned against me...) and I usually stay with them. my group of friends consists of: me, my boyfriend, my friend from my old school (boy), and, well actually that's it. I am determined not to lose my boyfriend. he's all I have, really. the other girls in my year hate me. especially during PE/gym because I'm not very good at sports, nor am I the best looking (I'm not afraid to admit it). they make fun of the way I do things, like how I run and things like that. the PE teachers see, but don't do anything. then in the changing rooms they hide my stuff and sometimes even take things out my bag and throw them outside. (I have found my books shoved down a toilet before. its sick). often the girls spray deodorant and hairspray at me, because II have asthma and it makes me cough, which the find rather strangely amusing. how do I stop them? what do I say? I have tried telling the teachers but they don't know what to do- and if the teachers talk to the girls who lead this 'team'- they know I told on them and do it more! I don't understand it.
the other kids call me 'the nerd', which is unfair. I thought being smart was a good thing- or are they jealous? some of them even think I have some form of problem, like OCD, or autism. I don't think so. surely i would have noticed by now? in lessons people refuse to sit next to me or work in a group with me. it's horrible- they make me feel as if its my fault. is it? I don't know what I've done wrong if it is. I have tried to make friends with some of these people- the usual stuff. being friendly, generous, helpful- but it doesn't work. I'm just a normal girl trying to fit in- I don't understand why the have no respect for me. any ideas on what is going wrong? or what I should do to try to make friends, or reason with the other kids?
other little (not really very) interesting facts:
I like Snow Patrol (my favourite band), and James Blunt (he's a singer if you don't know)
I like hamsters. I have 4. I named one after my favourite school teacher (his name is Bradley, by the way).
I want to be a teacher and an author when im older. I study well, and hope to be rewarded
and, I like doctor who, I watch it with my mum and dad.

Any (nice) comments welcome

Answer 1

Wow, you sound like the female version of me. I know what it's like to be an outsider, and to have everyone pick on you and to make your life hard. I always found the best thing for me was to ignore them. Find a few people who will be friends with you (and there will always be some) and just ignore all those people who choose to pick on you. They're not worth listening to. And no, telling teachers hardly ever helps. The fact that you have told a teacher can sometimes make it worse. So try and deal with it alone. Hope this helps.

Answer 2

you could ask if your school could have a hamster as a school pet,and if they do you could tell people about the hamster.Once they start asking questions you might end getting some friends.

Join a club or or invite some people over and just see who comes.Have a party or something at the neighbourhood swimming pool.



1.Be as confident as you can, but avoid being pushy or cocky. There's nothing that attracts people more than someone who's secure in who they are and has a fairly positive attitude about life in general and other people's ideas, too.

2.Smile and laugh. It sounds like a no-brainer, but it really works: Make eye contact with others, smile at them when they look at you, and laugh when they say something that's funny or amusing to you. It's a great conversation starter, and it makes you seem friendly and approachable.

3.Invite others to do things. In a lot of cases, you'll need to make the first move to find potential friends. Ask some people to share a table at lunch or study hall, borrow or lend a sheet of notebook paper, ask someone to be your volleyball partner in gym class -- you get the idea. Once you've found a few people you like, ask them to grab a bit to eat or play video games after school.

4.Join some clubs and activities. A new school and a new group of classmates offer a great opportunities to explore some new interests. Try out for a school play or sports team, join the yearbook committee or try attending a few school-sponsored volunteer activities through groups such as Key Club or Circle K. You're virtually guaranteed to meet people who share your interests -- and are looking to make new friends, too.

5.Have an opinion. Are you a die-hard fan of the Chicago Bears or "Gossip Girl"? Are you passionate about helping the homeless or preventing destruction of the rainforest? Speak up. Offer your opinions in class and share your unique viewpoints in conversation. As others what their opinions are. People will remember you in no time -- and want to talk to you and, most likely, hang out to get to know you better.

6.Remember people's names. Do your best to remember other people's names and interests. More importantly, don't be afraid to ask people more than once what their names are. Say something like, "I remember you said something really interesting about X yesterday and wanted to talk about it some more, but I'm new here and don't remember your name yet. Could you remind me what it is?"



hope this helps

Answer 3

You sound like a really great girl. There's nothing more you can do than what you're already doing. Teenage girls are bitches. I know how uncomfortable it is to feel ostracised. You don't need to change, they just enjoy picking on certain people cos it stops it being them. They're probably jealous that you're intelligent. Don't hesitate to tell teachers when the situation requires it. They already don't like you and,sometimes people stop when they get told off. I wish they weren't doing this to you cos you don't deserve it,keep being proud of yourself and know that these people are nobodies and once school is over, you won't give them a thought and will forget their names/faces,they're that nothing.

Answer 4

Screw those bitches, in a few years they'll be working for you!