shri
2008-08-06 01:36:42 UTC
i have admitted my mistakes ..bt m i so wrong ,wat wud u do if u wud be in my place ..my papa was sick ..i wanted to do al best for him ..wanted to be beside him ,even thou nt as son ,..bt wanted to reach on those expectation wat a son cannot do or has not done till date ..wanted to get married to a person who can understnd d situation dat i can always stay beside my parents whn they need me ..i came across a net guy ,,always frm before spk jus hi and bye ,,bt later on it became too much ,we started spking on fone ,he trusted and gave his email passwrd ..yes we both agreed dat we like each other widout even meeting each other ,bt whn he knew dat for fture dis is nt rite ,he started ignoring and told me d truth later dat al dis is nt possible ..initialy fr few days i kept quite ..bt later we al have a habit dat we spk to few of our ofice colegues and so ,which i did ..bt d blame does nt go on anyone else ,it is me who did wrong even thou ppl do their wrk of saying bt person who does wrong is d wrong person ..
other women told me dat dont let things go keep a track ..i like an idiot ***** started keeping track of his email as he had trusted and given me ..bt i used to watch it frequently ..used to mesge on his one mis call ..bt later one day i saw couple of emails from another female to him ..dis is where a jealousy was born dat ..who dis lady is ...i tried spking to her ..bt no reply .and later he also did nt reply much ..told me dat y i have fallen behind him ..i wrote al lust from his inbox to his frnd ..(d bigest mistake)..
which he yelled over me ..i denied i did nt do it ..i made another id frm his name and mailed her ..dis lady started spking me ..i understnd dat they like each other alot ..and he doesnt ..dat was d time i understnd dat i have done wrong and d most dirtiest mistake ..im nt a **** piece ,,i have nevr done wrong before dat to anyone ..nor did i do anything for money or lust ..it was dis dat i realy fell into sumthing and tried to achieve things beyond my limit ...i told dis lady al those which i knew frm him abt him ..so dat it does nt anoy him in any way and she does nt comit any such mistake whr he gets angry ..every time d lady used to say me abt him ...and he used to yell over me fr things which i did nt knw in between ...sumtimes whn he used to fite widout reason ..den too i spoke to him frm diferrnt id dat wat does he need ..he said his other frnds dat i only require lust adn i slept wid him ,,which i havent ..i havent even met dis guy til date ...
bt i did have feelings ..i dont knw hw ..i had to move away frm al dis ..coz d other side i needed sumthing to be done fr my home ..i came acros his colege in my city ..i was causually spoke to him ...step by step i tried cuming out of d world which i was in ..i told him dat im geting married - in return i heard alot ..he said i have wrong relation wid his colegue which until then i did nt have ...bt later yes d path changed and i moved difrnt way ..
there was another man now who enterd my life ..he nevr spoke **** to me anytime ..nor said anything wrong ..it was mistake frm my side dat i thougt dat may bi things r difrnt ..i nevr knew dat he is married ..other frnd of their told me dat he is in verge of divorce .so i thougth may be if d person is in d same city ,,i can live near my parents and things will be taken care ,,he wont stop me from wrking and i can be helping hand to my papa ...is dis wrong wat i thought ??? he told me direclty al dis is nt possible ..coz things r ok wid him ...again evry thing broke ..i gt back fr 2 days bt den he himself said - people dont understnd wat they have ,,and they ignore it ,,he said until im wid u ,,im urs ..d only thing came to my mind was may be after few months he is getting divorced so he is saying so dat .......................
any person wil get d same asumption of dis dont u think ??
he nevr said anything wrong to me nor spoke any **** to me ..always behave as a gud frnd ..bt me hopless character im ..worth nothing ..i told him i wanted to live one day of life wid him ..until den sex did nt touch my mind ...i went wid him ..since long time i hadnt steped out ..bt both being together things went wrong ..i knew it was my mistake ..its nt dat we had sex or so bt jo bi hua ...sahi nai hua ..it is wrong on me as daughter ,as a person ruining other lady (his wife) life by taking her place ..even after dat i thought may be we went so he wont leave ..bt nw his wife was back and he nevr told me ,,and she calls me sudenly ..in d begning ,i did correct wat my mind said and told her dat mesges went to wrong person and he is nt like dat kind of man ,,i stated dat 2 ppl can have same name so dats wat hapend ..so dat he does nt fall in any problm ,cz i cud nt see anything wrong hapening to him ..later dont knw wat hapend dat i started again wid nonsense ..by troubling his wife wid calls .he told me many times to keep quite ..i came to knew dat he has kid now ..u people say me wil nt kill u dat he hided so much frm me dat he has a baby ..i in anger kep saying rubbish ..im nt dat bad dat wud hinder a lady life wid a kid wid her ..nor wud take d hapiness of d baby ..he had sold me a laptop ..i knew nothing much of computers ..bt ppl cud hear and see frm d other side evrything possible ..i gt ruined by another person as i went in search of dis man ...as he stoped spking and many nonsense things hapend ..it was a revnge yet i dont knw ke kisne liya ..bt i heard d net guy voice frm d system ..they yet have acces to my system and fones ..i have now lost my papa ..did nothing jus dat i have ruined ppl life ..they have taken their revenges who evr wanted to .i gt ruined by another person as wel ..dont knw who had fitted d webcam and microphone to system ..they cud view and fun has been made of my mother ....i tried doing gud later fr his life ,i mesged al wrong to his wife saying dat ..ur hubby is al rubiish and doesnt agree to sleep wid me ..mesged hre al rubish fr her to understnd dat its me who is wrong and he does nt agree fr it ...coz in reality i did wrong to a person who did nt do wrong to me anything ..his wrong was dat he did nt say dat he had a kid which made me do more wrong ...he thought i wud nt be able to listn al dat or wat which i m nt aware ..bt not whn i m begging him fr help so dat i get out frm evrything ...he does nt reply .his number is disconnected ..i mailed him to reply as a frnd ..coz i cant acept anyone who cums my way as a frnd ..nor im ruining his life ..d net guy he spks from difrnt id ,...he is married .i have verbally asked and begged them al fr frgiving me ...
i have done wrong ...at my wrk place also people r siting around who trouble like pain ..lady beside me siting says say ur mother wat u have done ,,,if i say my mother d truth dat i wnt wid a guy ..i will loose her which i cant and dis lady keeps saying dat i dont like my mother so ..she says dat im only worried of d net guy so im doing al dis ..people behind keep making fun d whole day ..hw many jobs do i change ..i jus cant quit d job ..i did nt hit stones on any one stomach dat people do dis to me ..can u say me wat is dat ...do u have an asnwr fr dis long story ???